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Tales of a Post-Grad Nothing

Friday, November 02, 2007

We're Back!

Hey, this site is back up. I had to take the site down for a few days for work, but now we're back up and all of you lovely lovelies who sent me kind/concerned e-mails can look forward to a daily dose of awkwardness once again. In fact, here's a photo essay to kick things back into gear. Enjoy! Or don't! Choose your own adventure!

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you a buttload of corn, make the world's largest corn maze. Last Saturday, I drove an hour and a half outside of Chicago to the aforementioned corn maze with some pretty kickass dude buddies where we truly did have an A-Maze-ing Time as the sign encouraged us to do:



Here's a fact about a corn maze. It doesn't really matter that it looks like this from the air:



It looks like this from inside no matter where you go:



In fact, once you've run out of corn-themed puns,* the cold begins to get to you and you'll realize that a corn maze is actually pretty lame, no matter how cheerleader-shaped or filled with high school kids the maze may be. Therefore, it's essential that you bring people who aren't opposed to smuggling a bottle of champagne in:



And then maybe rockin it out with a spontaneous corn dance party to The Karate Kid soundtrack:



And cooling it down by slow dancing to Glory of Love:



And wrapping the whole thing up by re-enacting some battles with corn stalks:



It also helps if one of them is dressed as Patrick Swayze from Ghost:



And if you top off the whole experience up by going to the diviest bar you can find and dancing to Poison songs. I guess a corn maze could be super fun if you're into reading maps at night in the cold. I, however, am way more into sipping some bubbly and dancing my heart out. If corn rock were a real thing, I'd be all up in that. Maybe that's a goal for next year.



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* My favorites included "Hey Couch, let's make a cornographic film," "I hope there aren't any Anacorndas in here," and "How close are we to Wiscornsin?"

5 Comments:

At 2:53 PM, Blogger Steve said...

Couch, you aren't fooling me. That last picture isn't from corn maze night, that's from the pub crawl the night before. How dare you lie to the internet!

 
At 3:33 PM, Blogger Chris said...

Oh crapballs, you're right. The pictures were all in the same folder and I just grabbed one. Ok, I went ahead and took it out. Happy now?

 
At 12:18 AM, Blogger christat said...

you don't want to be a corned woman for being in a cornographic film. that would be such a corn in your side the corning after.

 
At 3:50 PM, Blogger d said...

i'm glad the corn maze has been so effective in pushing the bears to win this year.

 
At 11:07 PM, Anonymous kerrianne said...

I'm pretty sure glory of love is one of the greatest "how do we dance to this?" songs of all-time. Which only serves to add to its overall appeal, I think.

 

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