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Tales of a Post-Grad Nothing

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Unsolicited Advice

If you ever make a bet with a seven year-old, make damn sure you can win. Specifically, if a first-grade girl looks up at you with her big, brown eyes and her chubby rosy cheeks and asks "If you mix oil and water, which will float?" and you, while making dinner, scrubbing pots, and thinking about your own job, say off the top of your head, "Water of course!," with a boom of confidence that implies that you not only know all about density, but about myriad other scientific topics too having graduated from an accredited university, do not make that claim or any other into a formal bet. Otherwise, you may find yourself totally wrong, totally embarassed, and in total silence for about 10 minutes before receiving a "special delivery" like this:

Other things you also never should do with a seven year-old include accidentally fouling her in a game of basketball. Should that occur, said seven year-old may look up at you with those same big, brown eyes and chubby, rosy cheeks and say without the hint of a smile, "You're ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak."

2 Comments:

At 1:43 PM, Blogger i heart dorks said...

Please tell Julia she is AWESOME.

p.s. in your face.

 
At 4:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak."

hahhahaaha

that's better than "your music's bad... and you're bad!"

is that from a movie or did i imagine it?

 

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